I realize that on so many levels this sounds lame….. the negative self-talk has been on high drive -- "get over it, she's growing up", "you're the one who has been pushing her to do this for her whole life", "this is normal, you're being an overprotective mom"…
At my Mom's house before we left for the airport, and again at the security gate, I held her while she sobbed and sobbed in a way that I've rarely seen her do before. She's so mature in so many ways, yet still just a 17 year old who wants to hang out on the couch watching movies with her mommy. She's now arrived in New Delhi, slept (finally!) after 24 hours of being in transit, has had her first puking session, and has started to explore the immediate area around her friend's apartment complex. She's questioning her ability to undertake this adventure but also realizes that it's understandable to feel fearful of the unknown.
I am SO GLAD that we went to Nepal in 2011 so that she's not arriving in India without any idea of the "chaos" of being in a developing nation. I'm also so glad that her travel partner is an equally worldly young lady who lives in New Dehli so understands the subtleties of Indian culture.
Many years ago I heard a parenting analogy that really spoke to me. It likens raising a child to building a bow and arrow, placing the arrow and aiming. As the builder and archer all you can do is make sure you use the best materials, pull with just the right amount of tension, and aim with as much accuracy as you know how to. At some point however you need to let the arrow go and trust that all the work you've put into it will be enough.
Many years ago I heard a parenting analogy that really spoke to me. It likens raising a child to building a bow and arrow, placing the arrow and aiming. As the builder and archer all you can do is make sure you use the best materials, pull with just the right amount of tension, and aim with as much accuracy as you know how to. At some point however you need to let the arrow go and trust that all the work you've put into it will be enough.
I think I let go of the arrow when I dropped her off at the airport. In my heart of hearts I know she can do this…… and so can I. Go be excellent Monkey.
2 comments:
That is an excellent analogy. With my kids still young all I can do is imagine a similar day in our future, but I do imagine it to be a day full of emotion, not the least of which is pride. Way to go, both of you.
Almost 20 years since my oldest did a road trip across Canada with her girlfriends -- and (can it be, really?) 10 since my youngest headed off to live in Banff for a year. I won't pretend those arrows never wobbled, but they're making their way energetically through the world, and it's pretty cool to watch. So will it be with Natasha and you, I'm sure. She's got strengths whose latent potential will become manifest on this trip, and you're the mom who got her to the place where she gets to discover that for herself. Brava to both of you!
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